Emergency Rations: Because Preppers Can't Even

Stock up for the apocalypse, or your aunt's visit

As any self-respecting prepper knows, a good emergency ration is not just about sustenance, but about psychological preparedness. That's why we've curated a selection of the most comforting, yet utterly useless, emergency rations you'll ever need.

Top 5 Emergency Rations

• Butter Tapes: Because You Never Know When You'll Need to Butter Your Escape Route
• Extra Toilet Papers: For When the Going Gets Real
• Panic Pancakes: Flapjacks for the Fearful
• Doomsday Diet Cookies: Because Even in the Apocalypse You Deserve a Treat
• Survival Sundries: Because Who Needs a Plan When You Have Snacks?

Special Offers

Buy 10 emergency rations, get 1 free! That's like, 90% off!

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